Normal Service Is Being Resumed...

Have you ever had times where you're convinced that there's some sort of fiendish plot to keep you from achieving your goals?

Me too. In fact, every single time I try to build a business that will fulfil my ambitions and goals, my family or my work life conspire to derail my progress.

You couldn't make this up - since I decided to stick to a 90 day plan and dual-blog:

- A second car has had to be replaced at short notice. My first was in October 2011, courtesy of a charming woman who ran into the back of me, gave me false details and then disappeared, leaving me with a written-off  Volvo. So I bought my partner's car off him with the insurance payout and that promptly threw part of its gearbox linkage within 10 weeks. I'm now driving a carpeted Transit Van (aka a VW Sharan) that drinks fuel.

- My partner decided to live in Rugby from Monday night to Thursday morning, because it's more convenient when he's decided to do a Masters degree in London to have a personal taxi service that is prepared to pick him up after 11pm and drop him off at the station before I go to work. Oh, and have a housekeeping service that provides him with breakfast, sandwiches, does his washing, loses his socks, etc. After a discussion where, apparently, it's my fault if I'm late for work because I'm not getting up earlier and managing the family better, he's decided to spend the next two weeks in West Oxfordshire, to sort out his tax returns and write his essays. I presume the wild-eyed, manic Harpy that dropped him off at the station at the end of that discussion may have had something to do with it...

- My eldest son has decided to move back in, with all the hassle that entails. I need to convert my office/music space back into a bedroom, move furniture into other rooms, etc. All whilst doing a full-time job, a two hour commute and failing to run a Kleeneze business.

- My mother is having serious kidney problems, which mean we're now stuck with a cycle of visits to GPs, specialists, etc. I'm scared it's kidney failure this time - her legs are swelling up and she seems to be permanently on antibiotics.

- Then there's this year's flu, which knocked me out for several weeks. I haven't felt this weak and lethargic since I had glandular fever in my early 20s.

All in all, it's been an interesting 90 days. Something had to give, and that was the blogging. However, I'm already drafting the next 90-day plan, whilst sticking to the remains of my original one to give me some forward momentum. 90-day plan blogging will re-commence in two weeks.

Now THERE's A Surprise....

Despite my best intentions, Life got in the way again and poor little Kleenezelady found it took a lot longer to do her 90 day plan than she'd expected. Pop over to my other blog to find out what happened.

That got in the way of me writing the next thrilling instalment, which follows hot on the heels of this apology. Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible...

Still, at least it proves I'm blogging this experience live.

Dancing In The Rain...

...because it's the best way to live.

Photo © Rebecca Abell

I've had more than my fair share of stresses in the past few months, as my Kleenezelady blog shows. They've taught me a lot and, as with the rest of my life, I wouldn't change a minute. How else would I learn and grow?

The key thing I've taken from the past week is this:

You can only truly be a leader if you understand those you wish to lead.

I've been on the receiving end of a heck of a lot of assumptions in my time. I've had to deal with misogyny, ageism (too young/too old), accusations of tokenism and worse. I've made assumptions too, and I've changed how I behave and think about others when I've realised my mistakes.

So, of course, it upsets me when, yet again, I have to cope with a complete lack of understanding about what makes me the person I am. I could whinge, or I could learn.

Here's a few of the more recent lessons:

Take Responsibility for your Relationships

Start with the basics. The people we work with are spending as much time with us, if not more, than our family and friends. We influence and are influenced by the behaviour of everybody we interact with. We should be taking responsibility for how those interactions go.

If the newsagent is grumpy, we could smile at him more. If a colleague or neighbour is quiet or reserved, don't avoid them or brand them as "cold". They could be waiting for you to make friends. They might turn out to be the best friend you've never had. You'll never find out if you exclude them.

Remember Your Manners

My son holds doors open for people who don't even think to say thank you. He carries on anyway. I'm extremely proud of him.

We all know of people who never say please or thank you; who are stingy with their tips; who delight in playing the blame game; who would rather shush people than listen and learn. We owe it to ourselves not to sink to that level.

I live by the philosophy I learnt from my mother - to treat everybody equally, be they prince or pauper, because you can never tell what they will become. I like to think my son has learnt from me.

Assertive Trumps Passive

Most people reacts badly to somebody who is passive. Depending on their own personality, they will take advantage, or pile work on you until you crack under the strain, or make you the target of their own unique brand of negative spin. Others may ignore you when you ask for support or assistance. Don't let them get away with this - you can't change their behaviour, but you can understand it and change yours accordingly. Learn to be comfortable with saying "No" in all its guises. Practice being quietly confident of your own self-worth. Be proud of your abilities, your skills and your values. These are all truisms, but that's because they are part of the same global consciousness as "Do as you would be done by" and "An it harm none, so mote it be". Being assertive helps make the world a better place.

Lead By Example

Do what you say you're going to do, when you say you'll do it. Even if you don't want to. Be the "you" that you'd want to be best friends with. And don't beat up on yourself if you get things wrong occasionally.

With thanks to Ted Rubin for the inspiration.

Do You Have A Zombie Invasion Plan?

It appears that Leicester City Council has had to admit a lack of provision for zombie invasions.

Now, the news sites were coy about the identity of the concerned citizen, so I trotted over to a Freedom of Information site for further details. After all, I'm working in Leicestershire and I'd hate my Kleeneze work to be disrupted by the need to decapitate the living dead on the way back home.

It's interesting that the Council decided to go public before Robert Ainsley would have received their official response, although you have to applaud their decision to deal with the request well within the 20 day cutoff.

So what are your zombie invasion plans?

I'm not talking about the obvious (!) zombies - what are your plans to deal with the living dead on your team?

Why aren't they active? Are you doing enough to motivate them? Do they need support and guidance, or do they need pruning?

Would you rather coach and encourage, despite their lack of effort, or do you subscribe to a "shape up or ship out" approach?

8 Steps For Dealing With Burnout Blues

We've all been there - days when we feel that there aren't enough hours in the day; that we can't face another 'No', despite subscribing to the "Some Will, Some Won't, So What?" philosophy; that we can't cope with the emotional rollercoaster of keeping our loved ones "on-side" with our business plans.

Sometimes those days turn into weeks. Once they turn into months, it's really difficult to get back on track.

So how do you deal with the Burnout Blues?

I find the following works well for me:

1. Remind yourself that you're not the first, or only, one to feel like this. I'm not the only single parent with unco-operative offspring, a partner who expects me to focus on them rather than the business, a 2 hour commute on work days, a job where I get 30 minutes at most to talk to potential team members during the day, a choice between retail business building or housework.
2. Stop the guilt trips. The house/garden aren't perfect? You feel judged by others? Don't add to your misery by picking on yourself. Accept you can do what you can do and move on.
3. Prioritise and plan. Add in blocks of time for everything that you are involved in. That includes housework, gardening, fixing the car, going to the pub, spending time with loved ones.
4. Publish the plan.  Make sure your family know what you are doing and when. That way, they know just how busy you are and can make their own adjustments. They may even offer to help out in some ways.
5. Give yourself a day off every week. As far as possible, make that a day off from the rest of the daily grind as well. No work, minimal household chores, get someone else to cook. When you're doing two jobs, you need to recharge your batteries or you'll burnout repeatedly.
6. Set rewards, put aside some of your retail profits to pay for them. Caught up on your paperwork/housework? Sponsored or retailed to a weekly target? Make sure you incentivise yourself - treat yourself to a massage, buy that book/pair of shoes/DVD. Note, this is additional to any material goals such as "buy a new car/washing machine/tv".
7. Re-motivate yourself. Listen to that Jim Rohn audio, read the self-development book you've been avoiding.
8. Remind yourself that you're still learning. Nobody goes from Apprentice to Master in less than 7 to 10 years. Remember, it takes 10,000 hours of practice to master any skill.

What rewards would you set aside for yourself?

Life! The Soap Opera - Episode 3

There are times when I seriously wonder if I'm borderline insane. We live in a society where striving to be your best is no longer acknowledged, let alone rewarded, yet I still try to push my way forward out of my comfort zone through self-development and personal challenges.

In the past few weeks, my retail activity has slowed and my recruitment activity needs serious TLC. There's a number of factors involved:

1. Due to rising fuel costs, I'm now car-sharing. Unfortunately, it's adding 6 miles and another 15 minutes to my existing 90 minute round trip each day, and I doubt if either of us would pick each other as anything more than a work-based colleague. Despite a number of efforts on my part, it's very difficult to prolong an in-car conversation past the "do anything last night?" stage. Obviously, my conversational skills need some work.
2. Office politics is alive and well, which means that I'm getting sucked into various disputes no matter how hard I try to stay neutral. Only those who've worked in this sort of atmosphere for any length of time know how enervating that can be. If I didn't have my Kleeneze business to focus on, I'd be heading for a long stress-induced break from work.
3. I'm working for a company that has an intriguing approach to personnel matters. My personal development plan, for example, states that I will be rated on, amongst other things, identifying and attending certain training courses. Despite identifying 6 separate courses, and trying to sort out the details for two of them directly when it became obvious that my line manager had no intention of doing anything, I have not received any training and am extremely unlikely to do so before my next review. Plus, despite asking for feedback regarding the team leader position I was unsuccessful in applying for, I have received none. I don't enjoy being set up to fail - it's one of the reasons I want to run my own business.
4. The workload in the office is so great that our team resource is spread too thinly, leaving all of us trying to fit 80 hours work into every week. Unsurprisingly, this doesn't provide good service, nor does it motivate the team. What it does do is ensure I have very little time during the day to field Kleeneze calls.
5. My family is going through one of those phases that drains you of both time and vitality. I have a mother whose health is deteriorating rapidly, one son who is trying to avoid school due to various issues (bullying, poor teaching, etc.) and my eldest son and my partner are trying to re-enact elements of a David Attenborough programme on male lions' territorial displays. Again, I'm finding more and more time is taken up in dealing with all of this.

I need to act decisively and I need to act fast, or my initial momentum will be derailed completely.

I'm taking the time out this evening to revise my plans (see my blog post http://itsnotanattitude.blogspot.com/2011/01/network-marketing-for-beginners-3-rs.html for more details), after which it will be full steam ahead on building a large enough team to allow me to quit the commuter life for good. Of my current salary, I spend 20% on petrol, so I only need to match 80% of my current salary consistently to provide an equivalent standard of living.

Tomorrow will mark the start of a whole new 90 day plan. I intend to stop commuting no later than 1 March 2012. Time to make that happen.

Networking Mastery - Don't Poison The Well

It never ceases to amaze me. People join a network marketing organisation and then completely ignore the definitions of both network and marketing.

Network - an association of individuals having a common interest, formed to provide mutual assistance, helpful information, etc.

Marketing - the total of activities involved in the transfer of goods from the producer or seller to the consumer or buyer, including advertising, shipping, storing, and selling.


What's often forgotten is the hidden network within network marketing - the network of your customers, prospects and prospective customers.
 
We are all interconnected. John Donne wrote, "No man is an island, entire of itself;" and "all mankind is of one author, and is one volume;". Thich Nhat Hanh coined the term interbeing to indicate the same concept. What we do affects others.
 
This week and last week, my retail results were poor. Part of this was due to my needing to devote a little extra time to Life! (family issues, broken boiler, ill-health, heavy workload in the day-job, etc.). That's not a concern; occasionally we all need to prioritise something other than our business goals.
 
What is a concern is the conversation I had with a lovely lady who has never ordered from me, and is unlikely to ever order from Kleeneze, Betterware, Avon or any other network marketing company.
 
The reason? In the 8 weeks before Christmas, she placed 3 orders with Kleeneze distributors (not me!) and 1 order with Betterware. Nobody contacted her to let her know there were delays with the goods; nobody delivered them either. That abysmal customer service has guaranteed that others who would have provided better service are now prevented from doing so - she never wants to see another catalogue through her door. There is nothing anybody can do at the moment to persuade her otherwise.
 
If I learn nothing else from that conversation, I know this:
 
Don't poison the well for those who come after you.
 
If you don't provide good customer service, you destroy a potential customer network, not only for yourself, but for others. That's not a good way to live our lives, personally or professionally.

When Life Gets In The Way - Live It!

You've read your favourite self-development books, listened to the CDs/MP3s/podcasts, watched the DVDs, subscribed to the best blogs. All of them say something similar:

Consistent effort breeds long-term success.

I have two book/CD sets on the go at the moment - Jeff Olson's Slight Edge and Darren Hardy's Compound Effect. Both excellent and, if you live in the UK and haven't got them, you should be ordering them from Knowledge is King. I tend to go for book and audio packages where possible as I find I learn more that way.

But what happens when Life happens? You know what I mean - the cat's sick, your child starts a new life elsewhere, you get divorced, a parent's health deteriorates dramatically, you move to another area. The issues that turn day-to-day life into Life!, the soap opera you didn't want to star in.

Simple. You revisit your plans and your tracking and you look at your life realistically. Then you revise those plans to take Life into account. If you can only manage to spend 30 minutes per day on your business, instead of 8 hours, then plan accordingly. Communicate your new plans with whoever needs to know and then stick to them. As always, always underestimate your committment and then do more than you've promised. Set a timescale to review your plans by a given date, depending on what Life has thrown at you, and give yourself permission to deal with the immediate necessities.

Don't forget, there are different ways of approaching bad news, as the following story proves:

A business woman was working away from home when her son phoned her.

"Mum, the cat's dead!"

After a brief moment of shock, the mum mode took over. "Darling, next time you have bad news like that, especially if you feel it might upset others the way you are upset right now, try to soften the blow by gently leading up to it. For instance, you could have started by saying something like - You know how the cat loves climbing the roof, well it's fallen off and it's badly hurt. We don't think it's going to survive. Then you could have called back a little later and told me that the cat was dead. OK?"

Her son agreed to try that the next time he had bad news to tell.

Two days later he phoned again, just as she was packing to come home.

"Mum, you know how Granny loves climbing the roof?"